If you are in the midst of a divorce and have children with your ex-spouse, the subject of custody will definitely be on the table. In fact, it might even be the most important thing on your mind at present. No matter if you are the mother or father of your child, you will have your reasons for wanting partial or full custody of your children. At the end of the day, all you want is what’s best for your kids – but when you and your ex disagree on what exactly that looks like, things can get ugly.
Divorce proceedings are never fun, but when a custody battle is entered, proceedings become hostile and difficult. It is always better to work things out amicably between yourselves, although sometimes this just isn’t possible. Here are three things you should know about custody battles before you enter into a legal fight for your kids.
Nobody Really Wins
When it comes to nasty custody battles, there are no real winners. Of course, a judge will rule in somebody’s favor, but the emotional ramifications of these proceedings can tear families apart in a significant way. Whether you agree with the ruling or not, you will come away from a custody court case feeling bruised, tired, and emotionally overwhelmed.
Why is this? Simply because in order to get full custody of your children, your Child Custody Lawyer will need to prove that their other parent is unfit to take care of them. If they are claiming the same against you, then all your dirty laundry as a couple will be aired in court, exposing old wounds and creating more tension.
Most Lawyers Want To Avoid Custody Battles
Although you might assume lawyers enjoy custody battles because it means they’ll earn a higher rate, this is quite the opposite to the truth. Most child custody lawyers don’t want to go to court, because they are aware of the damage it can do to the family in question, particularly your kids. Even if your kids don’t testify, the drama of a court case will affect them deeply.
Family lawyers want to protect the kids in the situation above all else and will help you try to resolve your custody issues outside of the courtroom before resorting to a hearing.
You Shouldn’t Drag Your Kids Into It
Of course, your kids will be aware that you are separating, and perhaps that you are fighting over who they get to live with. It is crucial, though, that you leave your children out of it as much as you possibly can. Parents who attempt to get their kids on-side by talking badly about the other parent will only live to regret this decision. Divorce is hard enough on children without them having to feel as if they are picking sides.
Whether or not you agree with the eventual custody decision, at the end of the day you are still a parenting team when it comes to the kids. Try to avoid the courtroom and resolve your issues without a lengthy, expensive legal hearing.